Aftermath
by Ravengirl1011
Summary: Post-Cyberwoman. What happened after that final scene? After Lisa is gone, Ianto has no idea how he will go on. Jack knows he has to make sure that Ianto is no longer a threat, and has to make an important decision, can he let Ianto stay? Ianto POV
1. Chapter 1

**Hello Everybody,**

**I decided to write this as a bit of a distraction from my 3rd Doctor story, simply because I'm having a bit of writer's block.  
**

**This is my "Cyberwoman" story, which every Torchwood author seems to have to attempt, and takes place straight after the episode ends. I'm experimenting with writing a slightly darker kind of story, so I'm sorry if the chapter isn't as good as it could be.  
**

**This was originally going to be a One-Shot, however I soon realised how long it was becoming (What can I say? I love vivid description) so I have decided to split it into 2 or 3 chapters.  
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**I hope you enjoy, so please read on...  
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As Ianto found himself kneeling on the blood covered floor of the archives, it took awhile for everything to sink in. The fact that he was responsible for the deaths of 2 people. The fact he was nearly responsible for the destruction of the entire planet. And the fact that the cold metal corpse he had clutched to his chest was Lisa. His beautiful, intelligent, perfect Lisa. Lisa, who he had worked so hard to save, the woman he had sworn to devote his whole life to, cut down by a shower of bullets. It just didn't seem real. It couldn't be real. He just felt detached as he heard great echoing sobs, which he dimly realised were his own, and as he watched his own agonised tears dribble down to mix with the spills of blood which occupied the hard concrete floor. Blood. So much Blood. Not just Lisa's, his mind reminded him sluggishly. There was that poor girl; Annie. Just another death that he was responsible for. He'd met her a few times delivering to the Tourist Office; she was nice. And now she was dead. Her body completely mangled; like Lisa's. His poor, poor Lisa. This couldn't be real, could it?

As he continued to weep, clinging to the mess of metal and flesh that had once been his girlfriend, he was aware that the rest of the team were still behind him. He could practically feel their gaze burning into his skull. The villains and heroes of this sad piece. They'd killed his beautiful Lisa, but had at the same time saved her and the rest of the world. The woman he'd loved would never have wanted to hurt people; to kill. She never would have wanted to live as what she had become. But, despite this, Ianto had to cling to the idea that she had still been his Lisa. That she'd still been alive. That he could save her, because the thought of losing her was just too much to bear. So, now he was just waiting. Waiting for the inevitable click of a gun, and the blast as it fired. Then the nothingness as the bullet pounded into his skull. He waited for it. He longed for it. However, it never came. All he heard was the thud of approaching boots, and an all too familiar voice booming down at him from what felt like 100 miles away,

"Get up." The voice commanded neutrally, as a large hand fell heavily onto his shoulder. However, Jack Harkness could get stuffed if he expected Ianto to move. Moving meant leaving Lisa. Finally admitting that she was gone, and that was something he just couldn't do. He had to cling on to her somehow.

"Ianto. Come on." Came Harkness's voice again, the grip on his shoulder tightening, as his voice seemed to become more authoritative. Couldn't he just shoot him already, Ianto thought as he continued to hug Lisa's corpse, the coldness of the metal contrasting to the remaining heat radiating from her tender flesh. He just wanted to hold her like this forever. He wanted to die with her in his arms. All he needed now was the bullet. However, apparently Harkness had other idea as the hand on his shoulder was removed, to be replaced by two strong arms, grabbing him up under his arms and attempting to drag him out of the room. Drag him away from Lisa.

"No!" He screamed, his cries echoing around the concrete cavern, as he began to struggle. They weren't taking him away from her. He had to be with her! As he kicked and threw his arms about desperately, he was aware of Harkness's grip on him becoming firmer, but not hard enough to hurt him,

"Owen!" He heard Harkness call as he continued to struggle, before suddenly another pair of hands grabbed him, the hands digging painfully into his flesh, apparently less concerned about his wellbeing. He continued to kick and scream obscenities, desperately trying to get back to the one he loved. However, even he had to admit he wasn't in the best of shape, looking after Lisa left little time to eat and sleep, and soon found himself overpowered, by the two other men. Within a second, he was being forcibly dragged from the room, and down the various corridors that made up the archives. He was sure that if he'd been in a better state of mind he would have recognised where they were going, but his brain refused to function. Seeming to have broken; along with his heart. Without her body in his arms, everything seemed so unreal. Like it was all just a bad dream, and any minute he would wake up to find he'd never been involved with Torchwood, and that Lisa, his Lisa, was alive and well.

It seemed as if his whole body was numb, refusing to obey his instructions. His legs not even being able to support him, as he attempted to regain his footing, while Owen and Jack continued to pull him along in stony silence. Vaguely, his was aware of footsteps behind them, more specifically the clicking of heeled shoes; Tosh and Gwen. Were they coming to watch him be executed? That didn't seem like a thing that they'd do. However with the amount of betrayal he'd shown, they had every right to want to see his death. It was only fair. But if they were all there, that meant they had left Lisa all by herself. They couldn't do that. Lisa hated to be by herself! Here he once again began to struggle in earnest, he had to get back to Lisa. He had to. Rationally, he knew that Lisa was gone, but the rest of him refused to believe that. He had to get back to her. However, his struggles did not last long, as a searing pain ran up his groin from where he had just been brutally kicked, causing him to double over, and allowing the two other men to continue pulling him along.

"Owen!" He heard Jack say sharply, in response, apparently unhappy with his medics treatment of him. Why did he care, if they were going to kill him, what was a little pain? The only response he got was a rough grunt, Owen always had been an uncaring bastard. Finally, the endless corridors ended, as Ianto was yanked into the main section of the Hub. Within a moment he was dragged over to the sofa and thrown down there, his chest the only thing to break the fall. The world then seemed to become muddled as he looked up at the faces of the others; his team. The people who just killed the love of his life. The people he had almost killed. Did he love them or hate them? His entire mind was just a mix of emotions. Suddenly, Jack stepped forward, grabbing hold of his wrists and pulling them into his lap, before removing a pair of handcuffs from his back pocket and quickly clicking them into place, before Ianto even realised what was happening.

"Stay there." He ordered bluntly, in a voice which left no room for argument; you had to obey. So, with little effort, Ianto sat stock still, his breaths only coming in short pants. Keeping his eyes down on his hands, as he heard the rest of the team move away; to talk about him. He could only make out the odd word within the whispered conversation, though frankly he wasn't listening. What did he care what was going to happen to him? His only reason for living was lying cold in the basement; he was alone. All he could focus on was his hands. Covered in blood. Her blood. His Lisa's blood. She was really dead. Oh God! Here he suddenly realised that he was once again crying his tears silently dribbling down his cheeks, as he continued to stare at the now drying stains on his hands. Though what surprised him more, was the fact that he had actually stopped at all, he felt like he could cry for all eternity. Maybe the tears could wash away the crushing despair in his chest, where his heart had once sat.

"What!" Someone exclaimed from the huddle a few metres away, the exclamation causing Ianto to once again stare at the group. Everyone looked horrified about something; well everyone but Jack. He had his back to him, but Ianto could clearly see he had his Captain's stance on; the one it was impossible to argue with.

"You can't be bloody serious, Harkness!" Owen shouted, his face seeming to contort in hatred and rage. Was it really that bad? Surely if they just going to kill him, Owen should be pleased, he had every right be. He'd probably volunteer to be the one pulling the trigger.

"This is my decision." Jack said evenly, aiming it towards all of them, not just Owen, "Go home. Take tomorrow off. I'll call you if your needed."

"But Jack," Gwen started, seeming to move towards the Captain, as if to shake some sense into him. Was the death he was planning really that bad? Was he going to torture him? It hadn't been unknown at Torchwood London, and Jack had every right to want to punish him, to drag the death out. So be it. He'd failed Lisa, he deserved every bit of pain that he got.

"No arguments." Jack replied curtly, taking a step away from Gwen's approaching figure. "All of you, go home. Now."

Apparently, that was the end of the discussion, as Jack walked away, leaving the other three standing there with their mouths hanging open. Without so much as looking at him, Jack passed Ianto on the sofa and walked straight into the office, allowing the heavy steel door to slam shut behind him; then there was silence. Complete silence as the other three members of the team picked up their things from their desks, and made to follow their Captain's instructions. Each of them seeming to turn and stare at Ianto as they made their way out . Tosh's eyes seemed to be full of pity, as she looked down at him. Pity that Ianto just couldn't bear to see, as he found his eyes once again dropping to look at his hands. Then it was Gwen's turn. Her eyes seemed to be full of confusion, her brow furrowed as she glanced down at him. She looked as if she wanted to understand what he had done, why he'd done it. Then again, how could she ever understand? No one could understand the love he felt for Lisa. She'd claim that she loved Rhys in the same way, that she'd do anything for him. Though, if that was the case she wouldn't spend every other night in Owen's bed. Then of course there was Owen himself. He looked down at him with blazing eyes, looking as if he'd like nothing more than to beat the crap out of him. Pure and honest fury.

Then they were gone, leaving Ianto alone. It wasn't as if he wasn't used to being left by himself, he'd done it for months, it was just the waiting. He just wanted to get it over with. Just wanted to die; to end it all. Clearly it was Jack that was going to do the deed. How ironic, he thought to himself, the man that had separated him and Lisa, would be the one to send him back to her. Now all he had to do was wait. Though thankfully, he did not have to wait too long, as within a minute of the others leaving, the cold steel door was thrust open, leaving Harkness framed in the doorway. He stopped and stared at Ianto for a moment, with cold calculating eyes, as if sizing the younger man up. And, though Ianto tried to meet his gaze, he soon found his eyes dropping, unable to look at his love's murderer; for hate and shame.

Then, suddenly Harkness was no longer stood in the doorway, he had grabbed a seat from one of the work stations and was now sitting in front of Ianto, and though they were now at the same height, he still seemed to be looking down at him. His eyes were cold, but seemed to be filled with a mix of emotions ranging from pity to rage, and everything in-between. Ianto couldn't bear to look. Vaguely, through the haze of his thoughts, he was aware that Harkness was touching him, pulling his hands forward on his lap and pulling up the sleeve of his, now blood covered, suit. He was aware of something cold being rubbed onto his skin, and then the all too familiar sting of a needle. This caught his attention long enough to notice the syringe being removed as Harkness placed it on one of the desks, before he looked down to the tiny hole that had been made. A small amount of deep red blood trickling out, to mix with Lisa's blood that covered his body. So, little compared to the amount that Lisa had shed.

"What?" Ianto asked quietly, all too aware of how weak his voice sounded as he spoke. The crying having made his voice sound as raw and tired as he felt. What had Harkness, just given him? Lethal injection was not normally Torchwood's style, and from the team's earlier conversation, he had been expecting a much more painful ending. Was it poison?

"Sodium Pentothal." Harkness stated, apparently just having read his mind, a humourless smile gracing his lips, "We're going to have a little talk."

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**So, that was my attempt at a slightly darker story, I hope I didn't over do it. **

**I will attempt to get the next chapter up with the next 3 or 4 days, as I'm currently on study leave, so have a lot of spare time.  
**

**Please Review, Favourite and Alert. I always love to know what people think.  
**

**So, until next time.  
**

**TTFN (Tah Tah For Now)  
**


	2. Chapter 2

**Hello Everybody,**

**I'm so sorry it's been so long, and hope your not to annoyed with me. Life has just be hectic! I also believe my computer hates me, as it has deleted this chapter 4 times, while I was attempting to write it.  
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**I will hopfully be updating more often from now on, but I can't make any promises, but please stick with it :-)  
**

**I feel I should say that this story is becoming a bit more of a character study, than anything else. So, I'd suggest turning back if that's not your cup of tea.  
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**Also, I realise it is long, but I just kept thinking of new ideas to add ;-)  
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**I haven't written for a while, so I'm not sure how good this will be. I hope I got Ianto's emotions and relationshp with Jack correct. Please tell me what you think  
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**I hope you enjoy the chapter.  
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A little talk? That was an interesting name for an interrogation, Ianto thought, as he continued to stare at the small puncture mark on his arm, still unable to make eye contact with Jack. Though of course it wasn't uncommon, at Torchwood 1 Yvonne had made it her business to personally question all wayward operatives, and they had used much more brutal methods than just truth drugs. Jack had a good reason to suspect he was hiding things, he was simply making sure there were no more threats hidden away. Not that his Lisa is – was – a threat to anyone, Ianto thought sadly, another sob forcing its way past his lips,

"Look at me." Jack said sternly, firmly grabbing Ianto's chin and raising Ianto's features until at last he met his eyes. Looking into those blue orbs, it was as if Ianto could see every emotion swimming around in the Captain's head: Anger, Pity, Betrayal, Guilt and the list seemed to go on forever. He then found it impossible to break the contact. Feeling as if he had to keep looking, to prove he was right and Jack was wrong about Lisa. To prove that he could control his emotions. To prove that he hadn't just been fooling himself the whole time.

"What's your full name?" Jack asked, quickly turning towards a computer, before once again meeting his gaze. Apparently he was recording this particular interview, Ianto thought bitterly, at least that meant he would exist somewhere. After all, in Torchwood you don't die, it's like your whole life is deleted. Deleted. Hearing that cruel word falling from Lisa's sweet lips, he shuddered,

"Ianto Ethan Jones." He responded, the Sodium Pentothal apparently having started working, as he'd wanted to stay silent. Again, he was acutely aware of how scratchy his voice sounded, heavy with unshed tears and damaged from his earlier screams. Though, it appeared Jack hadn't noticed, or simply didn't care, he was more inclined towards the second option, as he continued to stare at him with steel cold eyes,

"What's your date of birth?" The Captain asked, surprising Ianto slightly with the simplicity of his question. Normally, they only asked the one simple question, in order to test the drug was working. Unless, of course, he was testing to see if Ianto had altered his record. To make sure he was who he said he was. To make sure he hadn't lied about anything else.

"19th August 1983." He responded dully, a half smile gracing his lips,

"I haven't altered my record." He told Jack, trying to speed up the process and bring on the inevitable bullet that was waiting for him, "Everything in my file is true."

"You expect me to believe you," the Captain asked, a brief humourless laugh echoing out from his lips, "after what you've done today. Not a chance."

Well, maybe he'd been hoping for too much, Ianto thought. Of course Jack wouldn't trust him, who would?

"Did you hide a partially converted Cyberman..." Jack began, before Ianto completely lost it.

"No!" He cried, pulling himself to a standing position, "She wasn't one of them! Don't you dare call her one of those monsters!"He had to get back to her, he realised. If he left her alone, these monsters, Jack and his so called team, would destroy her. He couldn't let that happen. It was his Lisa not some metal monster, down there in the damp, dark cellar. He had to get to her! He had to protect her! As he made for the opening that would lead him down to into the bowels of the Hub, he should have known he wouldn't get very far. His hands were still handcuffed in front of him, so his balance was practically non-existent, and of course he'd been sat in front of Jack Bloody Harkness! Did he really expect the Captain, to just let him run past? Within seconds of his running he felt a huge weight collide with him, toppling him over onto the concrete floor. With no hands to stop the fall his entire body slammed against the unyielding material beneath him, knocking the air from his lungs and causing his head to spin. Of course Ianto knew who it was before he even heard the harsh voice whispering into his ear, but as the other man did so, it just seemed so much more humiliating.

"Did you really think that would work, Ianto?" Jack asked slowly, the coldness in his voice causing the younger man to shiver.

"No, Sir." Ianto whimpered, the answer being drawn out of him through the drug, as he felt warm tears once again begin to trickle down his cheeks. Without another word from the Captain, he found himself being hauled up by the collar of his shirt, now covered with deep crimson stains and gashes, and dragged, once again, to the sofa. Wordlessly, Ianto found himself being pushed roughly down, his head colliding with the brick work behind him, as his body crashed into the cushions. Calmly, the Captain returned to his seat in front of Ianto, the younger man glaring at him through tear stained eyes, before speaking in a level tone,

"You're going to answer my questions, whether you like it or not, Ianto." Jack stated, his eyes seeming gaze into Ianto's very soul, "I wouldn't attempt to make it harder on yourself." So, taking a deep breath, the Captain resumed his question, though it shocked Ianto to hear as he changed it slightly,

"Did you deliberately bring something, which could be a threat, into Torchwood?" He asked, apparently thinking carefully about his wording, as he seemed to pause every other moment.

"Yes." Ianto choked out against his will, he eyes fastened to his hands as they convulsively clawed at one another. He couldn't look at Jack. If he did he knew he'd snap. Either into a fit of rage or a fit or anguish. Neither an option with the Captain watching him like a hawk. He just wanted to get this over with, so he could receive the bullet he so longed for, and join his Lisa in oblivion. With no Jack Harkness, no Torchwood and no pain.

"Are there any other threats," Jack started harshly, his voice like a slap across the face, bringing Ianto out his silent reverie, "that you have brought into Torchwood or created, that could injure or kill anyone, including yourself?"

The last part, appeared to have been added on as an afterthought, and Ianto found himself wondering if Jack really cared if he lived or died, or if he was just saying it for the recording. To make sure that his little team thought that he had really cared about Ianto before he had shot him.

"No." Ianto practically shouted, feeling every bit of rage he had in his system come to the forefront of his mind. "No there are no other threats Captain! You're the biggest threat here in Torchwood, aren't you? Sitting there, all high and mighty, when you're the biggest monster we have here! You could have shown some bloody mercy! Or is mercy beneath you!"

Here Ianto found his anger evaporating, once again to be replaced by anguish, as he dropped his head again and began to silently sob. The monster in front of him, had killed her without even trying to help. He had shot her in cold blood and now she was gone. His Lisa was dead.

"Interview complete." Jack said in his most professional voice, before Ianto heard him move over to the computer and tap at the keys, apparently ending the recording. As he heard the wheels on the chair return to the space in front of him, Ianto couldn't help smiling slightly. This was it. All he was waiting for was the gun being cocked, then fired, and then it would all be over.

"You betrayed me." He heard the Captain state softly, from the seat in front of him. He sounded almost regretful, Ianto thought bitterly. He'd probably be over the regret by the time he got another piece of eye candy to help around the Hub. Ianto Jones would simply disappear into the ether of history, never to be mentioned again. The only thing Jack Harkness was regretful about was the fact he was about to lose his play thing.

"Do you know the punishment for betrayal in Torchwood, Ianto?" He asked, his voice beginning to regain its sharp edge. "Of course you do. They implemented it enough at Torchwood 1."

"Yes." Ianto practically growled, continuing to stare downwards, not trusting himself to look at the other man, "It's death by shooting. A single bullet in the back of the head. So, why are you dragging it out? Just do it!"

Suddenly, Ianto was no longer looking down, someone having grabbed the scruff of his neck, and yanked his head up painfully.

"Oh no." The Captain practically snarled, his eyes two burning pools of anger, "You don't get away with this that easily."

Here the older man stood, his eyes burrowing down at Ianto from above, seeming to mentally rip him apart. But, that was Jack Harkness did, wasn't it? Ripped. Killed. Destroyed. He'd done it to Lisa, so why wasn't he giving him the same treatment. He longed for it.

"Why?" Ianto hissed, undisguised hatred seeping from the word. "I want to die. You clearly want to kill me."

Here the younger man attempted continue. Attempted to allow his hate to burst out. However, he was stopped in his tracks as he heard laughter. Cold, hard and unforgiving laughter.

"You don't want to die." The Captain stated as he looked down at him, that sinister grin still gracing his normally friendly lips, "I've been there. You don't."

"How the hell do you know what I want?" Ianto practically screamed, longing to wipe that smug grin from the Captain's face, but realising attempting it would get him nowhere.

"I want to be with Lisa." He continued, noticing how his voice seemed to falter as he mentioned her name, "I want to see her and know we're safe from you, and those other monsters you call a team!"

Suddenly, his voice broke, and tears began to fall freely. Here he was explaining himself to Jack Bloody Harkness. The man who killed the one thing that mattered in his life. Why did he have to give him a reason? For all those times that he'd followed along behind him, like a good little lap dog, cleaning up his crap, couldn't he grant him this one mercy?

"If you don't give her back to me," He whispered harshly, finally looking the man in the eye, attempting to penetrate and get through to that tiny thing the Captain called a soul, "you're a crueller bastard than I ever thought."

From then, a long silence rang out across the Hub, with only Ianto's occasional whimpers to break it. Looking at the Captain, it seemed to Ianto that he didn't know what to think; a big a achievement for the man that had an answer to everything. His deep blue eyes seemed to be analysing the younger man below him, the emotions within constantly changing.

"You really think that's what happens?" The Captain mused softly, not even appearing to be addressing Ianto, off in his mind. Slowly, Jack sat down once again, leaving him and Ianto at the same level. His deep eyes full of determination, meeting those of the younger man, filled with desperation.

"Ianto, there is no great reunion." He said softly, as if speaking to child, "When you go there's nothing. It's just darkness."

"No." Ianto said, his voice sounding flat and dead, even to his own ears. "This can't just be it. You can't know that."

He was wrong. He had to be. If this was it, that meant he'd never see her again. He'd never see her smile. He'd never hear her laugh. He'd never feel her lips on his. That meant his Lisa was gone. She just couldn't be gone, she couldn't! Here his head once again dropped, his eyes squeezing themselves shut, in some vain hope that if he could no longer see the Captain, he wouldn't have to face what he was saying.

"I know you don't want to believe me," The Captain continued in that, far too sweet voice, "but it's true. Ianto, she's gone. She was gone a long time ago."

Here the Captain attempted to lay a hand on the younger man's shoulder, in some vain attempt to seem comforting, supportive or loving. He was none of these things. The touch seemed to burn, and within a second Ianto had pulled himself away, allowing himself to fall gracelessly onto the rest of the sofa, his face a picture of rage.

"Don't you dare talk about her!"He practically screamed, attempting to throw himself up, just to head butt the insensitive murderer in the face, "We could have helped her! She was still Lisa, and you killed her! You heartless monster."

Finally, Ianto had managed to get himself up, fully preparing himself to launch himself at the older man, but before he could he found himself pinned, one more to the, cushions below him. The unmistakable weight of the Jack Harkness, pushing down on him. He could practically feel the other man's eyes burning into the back of his skull.

"We couldn't have done anything!" He hissed, pushing painfully down on the back of Ianto's neck, "Are you forgetting that thing tried to kill: Gwen, Me and You."

Of Ianto knew that, he just couldn't bear to except it. Painfully, he bucked his body against the Captain's weight, desperately trying to get away from hear, to shield himself from what he was being told, but he was held firm.

"It killed Annie." He continued, his voice stiff gruff and cold as he held him down, "Or did you forget about her as well? If it got out, what else would it have done?"

Suddenly, the pressure was released from Ianto's back, allowing him to sit up, and remove his face from the wet patch he had just created, his tears having just dripped into the fabric. With much effort, he managed to avoid looking at the Captain, who now sat beside him on the sofa. Until suddenly, he found a rough hand grabbing his chin, forcing him to look at the man sat beside him.

"I asked you a question Ianto." He stated in a stony voice, keeping a firm grip on the man's face, "What would it have done? You were the one at London, after all."

Here Ianto snapped, ripping his head out of his grip, before glaring at the man with eyes of fire,

"Yes I know what could have happened," he began, practically spitting the words, "if it was a Cyberman. But she wasn't. She was my Lisa. I know she killed Annie, but," Here he paused again, unsure how to finish, why had Lisa done that? "confused. It was her, she wasn't a threat."

"You're in denial." The Captain sighed, as if he knew anything about emotions. "You've got to except this Ianto. If I'm going to keep you around..."

"And why are you doing that, Sir?" He interrupted mockingly, honestly not understanding, "You clearly don't trust me. Just blow my brains out, or retcon me in to a vegetable. Just make up your mind."

"I've told you already," Jack started again, and though he couldn't see it, he could practically sense that stupid smug grin, "you don't get away with it that easily."

Suddenly Ianto found his face engulfed in the Captain's hands, holding his head in a vice like grip, his eyes boring into his. It was almost hypnotic, and he found he couldn't avert his gaze. The man he loved for making him feel as if he could actually be of use, bringing him into Torchwood; the only man he'd ever loved. The man he hated, who had killed the one thing that remained from his life before the Cybermen had destroyed it all; the only woman he'd ever loved. The man he felt heartbroken for betraying, but would do it again in a heartbeat if it meant saving her. There's was only Jack Harkness.

"Retcon or death wouldn't be a punishment," he continued, still holding Ianto's face between him palms firmly, "it would be easy compared to what you have to do. No, Ianto Jones, your punishment is so much worse."

"You have to come to terms with what you did." His voice, seemed to become slightly softer here, almost regretful, "Your punishment is to understand and remember. This will be engraved in your memory for as long as you live. The anger. The pain. The guilt. You'll have to face all of it every day."

It almost seemed as if Jack was speaking from experience, and unconsciously felt a tear drop from his eyes. Only for the Captain to stroke it away with his thumb. Then finally, he withdrew his hands and the spell was broken. Ianto could no longer feel that connection to the man next to him. He didn't know what to think of him, but the hatred was still bubbling inside of him.

"What the hell does that mean?" he croaked out, amazed at how weak his voice sounded suddenly.

The Captain raised an eyebrow at this, apparently surprised at Ianto's sudden change of mood, but didn't comment on it. Instead, his voice turned more conversational, as if they weren't discussing his punishment for almost destroying Torchwood.

"You know Ianto," he started, with a slightly hard to tint to his voice, "I'm quite good with drugs. Better than you guys give me credit for."

Drugs? What was he going on about, Ianto thought to himself, a small frown making its way across his features. Then suddenly, it hit him, as he looked down at his arm and the small puncture mark, realisation suddenly dawning on him.

"He's got it." The Captain snorted sarcastically, "The second half of that little mixture I just gave you should be kicking in."

"You see Ianto," He said, leaning towards the younger man, and looking every bit the predator eyeing up his prey, "In order to really understand what you did, you're going to need to revaluate a few things. I'm going to need to know a few things."

Here, he again paused, before flashing Ianto a brilliant Jack Harkness smile. Looking like a crocodile, and just as deadly, forcing Ianto to a attempt to squirm away from him, but suddenly he found the Captain gripping his arm painfully, preventing method.

"You and me are going to look at everything Ianto." He muttered darkly, "Time for a trip down memory lane. Whether you like it or not."

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**So, that was chapter 2. Sorry about the length. **

**In the next chapter there will probably be a lot of flashbacks, as Jack's new drug comes in to play, so fair warning.  
**

**I will attempt to update as soon as possible, but I can't make any promises (Think I jinxed it last time)  
**

**Please Favourite, Alert and Review.  
**

**Until Next Time  
**

**TTFN (Tah Tah For Now)  
**


	3. Chapter 3

**Hello Everyone!**

**I know it's been a long time, but you can call back the search parties, I'm still here. Real life hasn't really given me much time for writing lately, but I finally had time to do this.**

**The flashbacks within this stroy were all meant to be in one chapter, but it was getting so long I decided to split it into two instead.**

_**The stuff in italics are**** flashbacks**_**, and you may even see a cameo from our favourite Time Lord.**

**Anyway, please read on and I hope you enjoy it :-)**

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At that point Ianto honestly believed he had never hated someone so much in his life. His Parents? Yvonne Hartman? The Doctor? None of them compared to the monster that sat in front of him at that moment. Harkness had just taken away the only thing he cared about in the world, what gave him the right to see the memories he had of her? Of his whole life?

"You Bastard." He muttered darkly, still attempting to free his arm from the Captain's iron grip. He wanted nothing more than to rise up and wipe the smug grin off of his face. To do the same thing to him, that he did to Lisa. Maybe if he was the one begging for mercy, he'd finally understand.

"Sticks and Stones, Ianto." The Captain muttered back, still continuing to hold Ianto's bicep with a bruising grip, "I need to know why you did this. If it was just a mistake, or if you simply didn't care. Take your punishment like a man, or don't, it's your choice. Whatever happens, we are still doing this." Here he finally released the younger man's arm, returning to the seat opposite him. It was as if it symbolised the change of roles, from the comforter from before, back to the interrogator. Ianto could even see the change in his eyes. It made him shrink back into the sofa. Seeing it all first hand was bad enough, he didn't want to relive it all.

"This won't give you satisfaction," he spat at the Captain, attempting to mock him into changing his mind, "you know it won't. You want to kill me. You want to destroy me for everything I did. So why don't you? It would be so simple, and no one would care. Hell, the team would probably be lining up to give you a pat on the back..."

He hardly saw the butt of the gun coming, until it crashed into his temple. Not hard enough to knock him out, or even draw blood for that matter, but he certainly saw stars, if only for a moment. He once again found himself lying across the sofa again, looking up into the furious features of Jack Harkness. He still had the Webley in his fingers, toying with the weapon, as if weighing up the options of what could be done with it.

"Sit up." Jack barked harshly, still looking at the weapon in his fingers. With an effort Ianto managed to obey, pulling himself upright, even as his eyesight swam. He knew he'd gotten to Harkness now, he'd reached his breaking point. Maybe now he'd just give him the bullet he desired, rather than continuing with this farce, which neither of them wanted. Suddenly, he felt fingers pushing at his temple, checking for damage? Why would he be doing that? Surely it had felt good? Monsters like him, liked to cause pain. Quickly he pulled his head away, his vision swimming again, but it wasn't as if he cared anymore.

"Just do it." He whispered, his voice sounding practically desperate and broken. Just as he was. Looking up into the Captain's eyes, he again saw the conflicting emotions swimming within the blue orbs. The man again looked down at the weapon in his hands, before finally lifting it, and aiming it at Ianto's temple. The younger man found his eyes again closing in anticipation, waiting and wishing for oblivion. However, in the place of the expected blast, all he heard was a sad sigh, and opening his eyes, he found Harkness looking down at him, the gun once again in its holster. He seemed to look so much older suddenly, almost tired. Sitting down, he again looked at Ianto, as if looking into his very soul.

"How did you and Lisa meet?" He asked softly, almost as if he cared about the answer. An answer he had no right to know, and Ianto had no intention of telling him. But, suddenly it was as if he was no longer in his body, his mind was racing back. Back to the day he met her, the best day of his life. It was as if he was there again, he could feel it, hear it and sense it. As his mind flew away with him, he wasn't even aware that this mouth had begun to work by itself, revealing everything to the man sat in front of him.

TW-TW-TW-TW-TW-TW-TW-TW-TW

_Great. Just Great. First day in a new job, and of course he was late! The bus driver had seen him running for it, and of course he'd completely ignored him and driven off anyway. Bastard! So here he was half an hour late, on his first day in a new job. You couldn't make it up. So, coffee cup in hand, he'd had that before he missed the bus and nothing would have been achieved from rushing it, he found himself walking into the lobby of Canary Wharf. No, he'd have to kick himself out of the habit of calling it that, Torchwood 1. Taking a breath, and fixing his tie, he walked over to the reception desk. It all looked very normal, but from what he'd been told it had to, this is the part the public could walk into and see._

_Then again, his assessment of normal, may have been a bit premature. The woman sat behind the desk, may well of passed as something from another planet. No one's hair could naturally be that blonde, and her skin was verging on orange, definitely not normal. Looking at her typing away at her keyboard, the things on the end of her fingers could certainly pass as claws, and whatever was covering her lips was most definitely the shade of blood. Perhaps Torchwood made a habit of letting the creatures they captured run the administration, like a rehabilitation programme, the thought made him smile. However, he was nothing if not professional, so with the smile still plastered on his face, he stepped up to the desk. However, it appeared to him that he must have become invisible, as the woman behind the desk seemed to be looking at everything but him. Finally, having grown board of being the invisible man, he let out a small and polite cough, finally catching the woman's attention. _

"_Can I help you?" She asked, looking at Ianto as if he were something she had just scrapped off of the bottom of her shoe._

"_Yes." He responded politely, ignoring the clear lack of manners being aimed at him, " My name is Ianto Jones. I'm meant to be starting today in the archives, I was told to report to the front desk in my confirmation email." Here he paused, glancing at the woman as she relayed the information into the computer in front of her. Knowing his luck today, it wouldn't be recognised and he'd be dragged out by the impressive looking security guard sitting by the lift. The woman looked up at him, a small smile on the blood red lips, which didn't meet her eyes._

"_And, may I ask who made your suit, sir?" She asked, almost looking as if she wanted to catch him out. It was the security question Ianto had been informed about, and of course he had memorised the answer._

"_Armani, of course." He responded automatically, almost enjoying the slight look of disappointment on the woman's face as she realised she wouldn't be getting the entertainment of watching Ianto be dragged away by security. She looked down, reaching into a draw in her desk, bringing out a white pass and sliding it across the counter to him._

"_Scan this to get into the lift, and go to level B2. They'll to you what to do from there." Then without another word, she went back to typing away on the computer, once again oblivious._

"_Thank you." He responded automatically, he'd had manners beaten into from a young age, before grabbing the pass and moving over to the lift. Making sure he shot the security guard sitting next to it a smile, which to his great surprise was returned, he may have just have made himself a friend. Scanning the pass over the panel, the door slide open, and stepping in, he quickly hit the B2 button before the lift kicked into life taking him down into the depths of the building. This slightly annoyed him, a building as big as Torchwood 1, and he was stuck working underground, there must be a great view. Then again beggars can't be choosers. With a 'Ping' the lift doors opened at his destination, and he walked out into a long corridor, with multiple doorways on either side, and what looked like a safe door at the end._

_Having no idea where to go from there he decided just to stick his head through the first doorway, hoping at least one person would know what he was meant to be doing. Big mistake. Within 5 seconds of walking through the door, everyone's eyes fell on him, including that of the woman who had interviewed him for the job in the first place. His boss; Yvonne Hartman._

"_Ah. Ianto Jones. You've finally decided to grace us with your presence." Yvonne stated sarcastically, her eyebrows raised and arms crossed, clearly awaiting an explanation. However, just as Ianto had opened his mouth, attempting to find anything to say that would stop him being sent packing back out the door, a woman jumped up from her desk, and ran over to him._

"_Oh, you got it." She said, pulling the coffee cup out of Ianto's hand, "Thank you Ianto. I really appreciate it." Here Ianto honestly had no idea what to say. Did he know this woman? Looking at her then, he honestly didn't think he'd have forgotten a girl like her. She was quite striking, to say the least. With smooth dark skin, and short black hair, which suited her, helping to emphasis her high cheekbones and chocolate coloured eyes. Who was he kidding? She was absolutely beautiful, and he was sure she'd look more so, if she was in something that suited her more than the hideous brown suit she was wearing. _

"_Oh yes." He responded, deciding quickly that playing along could only help, it at least gave him a chance, "I hope I got it right." Here the woman lifted the cup to her lips, sipping the contents and attempting to hide, and failing somewhat, the fact she disliked the drink. Apparently she took it differently to him, and was obviously wrong in that case. However, he was desperately hoping Yvonne hadn't spotted the look, it looked to be his only chance of remaining employed. Here the woman turned to Yvonne, Ianto was practically holding his breath,_

"_I'm sorry Yvonne," She said, actually looking like she meant it, "Ianto was here about half an hour ago and I was so busy looking at that translator we brought in, I asked if he wouldn't mind going out to get me a coffee. I didn't realise it would take him quite so long." Here the woman arched a well-shaped eyebrow at him, and he made his best attempt to look sheepish, well he'd been good at drama in school. Luckily for both of them, it looked as if Yvonne was buying it, maybe his mystery woman had done this before. _

"_Alright," Yvonne conceded, still sounding slightly annoyed, though Ianto was now happy it wasn't aimed at him, "but Lisa, you really can't send my staff of whenever you feel like it. He hasn't even been registered yet, what if he had been mistaken as unauthorised. Get back to work, and we'll talk about it later." Here the woman – Lisa- went back to her desk, doing a fantastic job of acting guilty, she was quite the actress. It was then he realised, Yvonne's attention was back on him,_

"_Ianto, it's good to see you again," She said, a smile now plastered across her face, as she shook Ianto's hand, "I'm terribly sorry about that misunderstanding. If you'd like to follow me, we'll get you registered and fill out the necessary paperwork." Then she left, leaving Ianto to trail after her, back towards the lift, and up into the main body of Torchwood 1 itself._

_An hour later Ianto made his way back down into the office he had first arrived in. He now had his own pass, with an awful looking picture of himself on it, and detailed instructions about what was and wasn't allowed in Torchwood. He'd also signed enough paperwork to have used up an entire tree, and been told the 'consequences' he would face should he break the terms of his contract, and that scared him. No matter how many smiles Yvonne gave him, and how many times she reassured him it was just a 'formality' the threat of being shot was still on the table. What had he got himself into? Then again, with a secret agency which captures aliens and their technology, beside sounding like a bad sci-fi film, it made sense. They wouldn't want their past employees with a grudge, spilling it all to the press. _

_Thinking all of this through, he wandered through the doorway, heading to the empty desk in the far right corner which had been designated as his. He didn't even want to know who had sat there before him, and what had happened to them. It was then he noticed who was sitting at the desk in front of his, it was his mystery woman; Lisa. Fixing a smile on his lips he made his way over, standing next to her desk, and again waiting. Why didn't anyone in this place seem to notice him?_

"_Um, hello," He started, finally catching her attention as she looked up at him, "it was Lisa, wasn't it?" Here she smiled, again raising her eyebrow at him, as she stood up to put them at the same height._

"_Yes," She replied, with what sounded to Ianto like a cheerful voice, it was like listening to a bell, "and it was Ianto 'Coffee is more important than work' Jones, wasn't it?" Here Ianto found himself blushing, reaching out to shake her hand, and holding on a little longer than was strictly necessary; she didn't pull away._

"_Yeah," He said, moving to sit at his desk, as Lisa turned at her own to continue the conversation, "I'm sorry about that. I missed the bus this morning, and I already had it, so I thought I'd at least be well caffeinated while getting the sack." That made her laugh, a squeaky little laugh, that made him chuckle himself, as he continued to look at her with a smile._

"_It's alright." She said, once she'd regained some composure, "You'd be surprised how often it happens, I honestly think London Transport has a vendetta against Torchwood. Anyway, we've got an agreement down here, we all try to protect each other if something like that happens. So, you always have to play along, make sure you back-up every story. You've been told what happens if you upset the boss, haven't you?" Her voice had turned more serious as the sentence ended, and Ianto knew exactly what she meant, one late mark means one bullet in the head, it was that type of place. Slowly he found himself nodding calmly, before deciding he had better attempt to lift the mood again,_

"_So," He started, not really sure where to go from there, "you'll have to let me get you an actual coffee to make up for earlier, won't you?" Here she started giggling again, and he suddenly realised what he'd done, his cheeks flushing furiously. Had he really just asked her out? They had only just met, and she was a gorgeous and strong woman, why would she go out with him?_

"_Not the best chat-up line." She stated, giving him an analytical, if still kind, look, "But, you're right you will. You still owe me big time." Here she stood up, fixing her jacket as she went, instantly drawing Ianto's eyes to her chest, before he quickly remembered himself, dropping his eyes to the forms on his desk. Quickly, he reached into the shoot by his desk and drew out the strange machine sitting in there, ready for him to archive it. As he glanced at it, Ianto heard her high heeled shoes clicking over to the doorway, then suddenly they stopped,_

"_Oh, and Ianto," She called from the doorway, causing Ianto to look up at her, and the grin plastered on her face, "you don't put nearly enough sugar in your coffee." And with that she winked at him, and left the room, leaving Ianto to grin at the comment, as he fiddled with whatever it was he had on his desk._

TW-TW-TW-TW-TW-TW-TW-TW-TW

As Ianto returned to himself, sitting on the battered sofa in the Hub, he realised he was smiling. Smiling at the memory that still made him laugh to this day, after that they had always teased each other about trivial things. It was a long running joke between them. Then he started crying, tears dripping down his cheeks, as he thought about the good times, and the things he'd never experience again. Glaring, he lifted his eyes up to the man in front of him, who he quickly realised had heard everything, as he'd had no choice but to spill his soul to the Captain, as his mind relived every agonising second.

"Why are you making me do this?" He asked quietly, desperately. This wasn't going to find anything out, it was just cruel. Even Jack couldn't be so evil as to make him think about what he had lost, all due to the Captain himself, could he? He really was a monster. So, it was really no great surprise to Ianto when he didn't get an answer.

"She sounds amazing." Jack responded instead, the look in his eyes soft, and almost reminiscent, as if he had known someone like her himself. But, that was impossible, there was no one in the world like his Lisa.

"She was." he responded briefly and quietly, not really wanting to reveal it all to the man he hated, but not being able to hold it in anymore. He'd hidden her for so long.

"It all started there, we just sort of fell into a relationship." He remembered, smiling somewhat at the memory of that first coffee, and how it had lead to that first kiss, "We teased each other constantly, but it was just playful, and I think I honestly loved her from the moment I saw her. I really loved her, we moved in together within 2 months, and she was a nightmare. She never would descale the kettle, she just said it didn't matter. It was all so fine for the 18 months I was there..."

There he stopped, unable to keep talking due to the knot which had suddenly appeared in his throat. It was painful, as he realised tears there were again trailing down his cheeks, and it was getting harder to breath. Everything he had nearly had in London, everything he had ever wanted, was just snatched away from him by those creatures. By that creature. Why couldn't he have done something to save them? He saved everyone else, he was a legend for it, so why couldn't he have saved his friends? His Lisa? Thinking this through, Ianto once again half-heartedly raised his eyes to the Captain, who was looking at him with a furrowed brow, but made no comment.

"I should have known it would all go wrong. Nothing ever goes right for me, does it?" He asked softly, Jack didn't respond, if the Captain didn't want to listen then too bad, he'd started this and Ianto had too much inside of him to hold in, "When the ghosts started coming through the Rift, I could tell something wasn't right, but no one would listen to a Junior Archivist. Lisa said I was just being paranoid, that I should enjoy seeing the ones I've lost again. She was so wrong. More and more of them started to come through, and of course Yvonne was burying her head in the sand, and then there was that sphere thing. The one no one could bear to look at, and of course when the Doctor arrived, I just knew..."

There he was suddenly interrupted by brisk words, which really showed quite how broken is own voice was.

"You saw the Doctor?" Jack asked, his eyes now wide and interested, as he realised just how close his rescue ship had been, "When? How?"

Then Ianto felt it again, the sensation of his mind disconnecting from his body, as it flew back through years of memories, to the moment that the Captain was questioning. The younger man was sure that Jack hadn't meant to ask him about it, a slip of the tongue possibly. But, he was sure he couldn't have helped himself. He was so desperate to get back to his precious Doctor, that any piece of information he could get, he had to have. Even if it meant making Ianto relive some of the most painful memories of his life. Well if the Captain wanted to know about his memories, then he was welcome to hear them, two cruel men together made sense, didn't it? So again, Ianto's mind flew back to the memories of his time at Torchwood One, as his mouth once again began to move, with no input from him.

TW-TW-TW-TW-TW-TW-TW-TW-TW

_Being alone in the office really was boring, Ianto thought to himself, as he once again attempted to identify the odd looking skull which had been left on his desk. Normally, he would have just asked Lisa for help, but of course she wasn't here. No one was. There were all up higher in the building, helping to examine that sphere-thing which had come through the rift a couple of weeks ago. The one he was no longer allowed to help analyse, due to orders from the infirmary. The sphere was odd to look at, and it made your head spin if you looked at it for too long, it was hardly his fault that he passed out the last time. But, of course Yvonne had been stubborn, as always, and now he was stuck in the archives, on his own. It should be down in the Geneva Convention as a form of torture. With nothing else to do, he decided he might as well go in search of a coffee, after all there was no one there, was there? However, as he was half way away from his desk, he heard the unmistakable clicking of high heels, Yvonne was coming down. Within a second he was back at the desk, fingers searching the skull for nothing in particular, as long as he looked busy._

_Finally, out of the corner of his eye, he saw Yvonne walk through the doorway, her black skirt-suit doing nothing to help, with making her look even slightly approachable. Though, to his surprise she wasn't alone, two individuals in civilian clothes followed her in afterwards. No civilians were allowed down here._

"_Ah, Ianto." Yvonne said, her PR smile firmly in place, as she walked over to his desk, "Working hard as always, I see." He forced himself, to return her smile, still sitting down. If there was some form of inspection going on, Yvonne would kill him if he didn't play along. _

"_Yes Ma'am." He responded automatically, taking the opportunity to glance at the two strangers who were wandering around the office themselves, "Though I must admit this one is a little tricky to identify." _

"_Judoon skull." A voice responded from across the room, grabbing their joint attention. It was the man that had followed Yvonne into the office. Looking at him now, Ianto's mouth practically fell open. He was reasonably tall wearing an old brown pinstripe suit with, what may once have been, cream converse trainers. Beside the fact that the combination should have been considered a crime, it wasn't the main thing which caught Ianto's attention. He recognised his face. The admittedly wild brown hair, and chocolate eyes which seemed so much older than the rest of him, combined together to tell Ianto exactly who this was. Everyone at Torchwood would know who he was._

"_Oh, Ianto," Yvonne started, attempting to keep control of the situation, "this is..." However, Ianto didn't let her finish, he already found himself standing up from his desk, as he continued to look at the alien in front of him,_

"_The Doctor." He responded automatically, his brow creasing somewhat as he attempted to work out why the alien was walking around Torchwood in the first place. Torchwood had never managed to catch him yet, and if they had, surely he would be in chains in the cells, rather than walking around correcting the staff. The man was practically a legend written through time and space, he had a whole room to himself further in the archive, which Ianto had always found quite interesting to look at himself. What on earth was he doing there? _

"_Someone's been doing their homework." Yvonne commented, raising an eyebrow at him, as he walked out from behind his desk. He'd be in trouble later, he'd interrupted her. _

"_Anyway, Doctor," She continued, turning to look at the man as he wandered around, looking at all the devices sitting on the other desks in the office, "This is our archive, and the office from which the archive team work out of." The man nodded, looking somewhat interested, though to Ianto he looked like a man humouring a small child, showing him something they found amazing, but was just common place to him,_

"_So, where is your archive team?" He asked, looking straight at Ianto, and making the younger man feel like an insect under a microscope, " I'm assuming an organisation as big as Torchwood has more than one person in it?" That got Yvonne's attention, she always took an insult to Torchwood as an insult to her, and Ianto could tell that the Doctor had figured that out, he almost laughed._

"_Obviously not." She responded, the same smile on her face, as she fought to keep her composure, "I believe the rest of the team is helping to analyse the 'void ship', as you called it, and Ianto is more than capable of holding down the fort, aren't you?" There was the hint of a threat in that question, and Ianto automatically found himself jumping to answer,_

"_I believe so, Ma'am." He responded quickly, his voice sounding steady, much to his credit. Luckily, the interrogation ended there, as one of the Torchwood soldiers marched through the doorway. As he glanced at the Doctor, Ianto could see his hands tighten ever so slightly around his gun, soldiers were always so paranoid. Looking at his tanned skin and blonde hair, combined with his freckles, Ianto could tell it was 'Thomas'. It was a PR idea which Yvonne had, come up with about a year ago, everyone had to know everyone else's names. There were even spot checks. What that had to do with catching aliens was beyond him, but apparently it looked good to a public, which didn't even know Torchwood existed. _

"_Ma'am." The soldier started, jumping to attention with a stony face, "We need you on the 10__th__ floor, the archive team believe that they have discovered something about the sphere." At the mention of the archive team, Thomas shot a glare at Ianto, and a satisfied smirk at the fact that Ianto was not up there helping. Ianto suddenly didn't like Thomas very much._

"_Of course, thank you Thomas," Yvonne, said grinning somewhat at the soldier, who Ianto knew she was attracted to, before turning back to the archivist, "Ianto, please keep an eye on these two, and I'll be back as soon as I can." She didn't even wait for a response, before turning and walking away, Thomas falling into line straight after her,_

"_Of course, Ma'am." He called as she went, all too aware that she had heard him, even if she hadn't responded. Ianto then turned to the two new-comers to his office, not quite sure of how to deal with them. Luckily, it wasn't left up to him to start the conversation, the woman that had accompanied the Doctor and Yvonne, decided to start things off ,_

" _Building like this, and you're stuck working down here." She stated, a clear London accent held in her voice. The younger man found himself smiling at the comment, and the woman herself, he'd often thought that to himself, and it was odd to hear someone articulate it. _

"_Yes, I suppose so," He replied, moving further out from beside his desk, attempting to keep an eye on the wayward alien who was still wandering around the room, "but you have to admit there's a fantastic view." That made her laugh, and all too soon Ianto found himself joining in. It sometimes felt like no one in Torchwood had a sense humour, well apart from Lisa of course, so it was quite refreshing, to be making jokes, even if it was just with a mystery woman in her 40s._

"_I'm sorry I didn't catch your name." He then said automatically, the manners of his childhood being brought to the surface, and curiosity overtaking all sense of the belief that he wasn't meant to know._

"_Ja..." The woman started, before suddenly she was interrupted._

"_Rose," The Doctor said quickly, having raced over to her side, and elbowed her firmly in the ribs, "Rose Tyler. She's my companion." That made Ianto raise his eyebrows somewhat, but he was polite enough to keep his mouth shut, but apparently the Time Lord caught the reaction anyway,_

"_What?" He asked, before apparently realising, "Oh yes. She fell into a worm hole and aged 50 years. She isn't what she was, but she makes a good cup of tea." Here it was time for 'Rose' to repay him the favour, giving him a sharp elbow to the ribs and a stamp on the foot. The Doctor then let out a pained yelp, jumping away and grabbing his foot, before making his way closer to Ianto, almost as if he was examining him._

"_What about you, Ianto?" He asked, moving towards him, as the younger slowly moved back, "What are you doing here?" Almost immediately, Ianto found himself jumping away from alien, uncomfortable with how closely he was being stared at._

"_I'm a junior archivist, Sir." He responded automatically, moving to pick up the skull, the 'Judoon' skull the Doctor had called it, in the hope of getting out of the conversation, by putting the skull in the correct hole in the wall to be archived, it didn't work. The Doctor simply followed him._

"_Well," the man started, backing the archivist into a wall, as he suddenly had a pair of thick framed glasses on his face, and staring intently into the archivist's eyes, "With an name like 'Ianto' and that accent of yours, you're clearly not from around here. I'd guess Cardiff. You have good manners, not commenting on Rose here, and you clearly don't feel comfortable with what Miss Hartman does, nor with the gun you are forced to carry with you. So, what are you doing at a place like Torchwood?" Ianto didn't know what to say for a second, how had he got all of that. They'd only met about 5 minutes ago. So, he decided the only thing he could say to the alien was the truth,_

"_It's a job, Sir." He responded, feeling somehow compelled to spill his soul to the Time Lord, "I wanted adventure and knowledge. I don't want to hurt anyone." The Doctor gave him a small smile, and moved back from him slightly,_

"_Then you're in the wrong job, Ianto." He said, his voice sounding deadly serious, "Torchwood will make you hurt people, whether you like it or not." Suddenly, Ianto noticed the alien in front of him had something in his hand. Something far too familiar. _

"_How did you get that?" He asked, reaching out in an attempt to snatch the small red box back out of the man's hand, before the man hoped away, holding it just out of reach. Had he picked his pocket? The other man then opened the box, looking at the small golden ring inside, with the three diamonds imbedded in the top. _

"_That's lovely." 'Rose' commented, moving towards the pair, as the Doctor too stared at the delicate thing inside of the box._

"_So, who's the lucky lady, Ianto?" He asked, his voice soft and gentle, compelling Ianto to respond, forgetting all protocol of not talking to prisoners, let alone telling them your life story._

"_Lisa." He responded automatically, holding his hand out for the box, which the Doctor carefully shut, but did not yet hand back, "We work together here, and we've been going out for 18 months. I know it's not long, but I know I love her, I want to spend my life with her. She's beautiful and funny and clever, and I just love her." By this point a huge smile was spread across Ianto's face, as he pictured Lisa. Pictured her reaction when he got down on one knee tonight at Dinner. He'd made the reservation and was going to surprise her. It was going to be perfect._

"_Take some advice, Ianto." The Doctor said seriously, laying a gentle hand on the younger man's shoulder, and looking as if his eyes could burn through into his soul, "Get away from here. Take Lisa and run as soon as you can. These 'ghosts', the void ship and the rift, are bad news and soon it's all going to blow sky high. Get out now, and go and live your life, because this will not end well." Suddenly, he was interrupted by the slight noise of clicking down the corridor, high-heeled shoes. Quickly the Doctor moved back, but continued to look at him with that intense stare,_

"_Remember that Ianto." He said softly, his eyes trailing towards the doorway, as the shoes got closer, "I've warned you, please listen to me." Then he nimbly threw the box back over to Ianto, before moving over to a desk and picking up the small round device which happened to be on it. Ianto just had enough time to stuff it back into his suit pocket, as Yvonne marched into the room, the smile still in place, as she examined the scene in front of her._

"_I'm sorry about that," She said, looking at the Doctor as he continued to fiddle, "I trust everything's alright." The Doctor then turned to look at her, a cocky smile on his lips,_

"_Yes, It's fine." He said, pulling the glasses off of his face and dropping them back into his pocket. "Ianto here was just telling me about the collection you have here." Oh God! He did not just say that! Yvonne quickly turned to glare at the young archivist, who quickly looked at the Doctor with wide eyes, attempting to get him to realise what he had said had been so wrong. Apparently, he did at least noticed the younger man's panicked look,_

"_Not like that." He said quickly, moving slightly towards Yvonne, "He just gave me the same line you gave me. You know 'If it's alien, then it's ours'." He even attempted an impression of Yvonne's voice, and it took every bit of Ianto's self restraint not to laugh, though apparently 'Rose' didn't have it in her to keep her mouth shut, as she suddenly burst out laughing. Yvonne tactfully ignored her, and Ianto practically breathed a sigh of relief as Yvonne once again smiled,_

"_Good." She stated, before making her way towards the door, "If you'd like to follow me to the control room, we're about to start the ghost shift." That caught the Doctor's attention, and him and Rose quickly followed her out, but not before shooting Ianto one more serious look, from which the meaning was perfectly clear 'Get out now!' _

_And then they were gone, leaving Ianto on his own once again, slightly unsettled by the Doctor's insistence that something was going to go wrong. Making his way back to his desk, he reached into his pocket and drew out the red velvet box, fiddling with it between his fingers, before reaching into his other pocket and drawing out his mobile phone. Quickly, he went straight to his contacts, scrolling down until he found Lisa's name, then with little thought he made the call, now not quite sure what he would say. 'Hi Lisa. You know the Doctor, the alien of legends that Torchwood hasn't seen hundreds of years, well he was in the office. I told him that I planned to propose to you, and he told me to leave Torchwood with you and run for the hills, saying the place was going to be destroyed. Also, when are you going to descale that kettle...' His thoughts were interrupted by a tiny bleep, and Lisa's fun loving voice in his ear,_

"_Hi it's Lisa here. I can't come to the phone right now, but leave a message and I'll get back to you. Now how do I turn it off?" The last bit made him laugh, Lisa never really was great with technology, hell she could barely do a 'Google' search, but he loved her for it. Now, what to say? Telling her an alien told him to run seemed to be becoming more and more obscene the more he thought about it. The Doctor was an enemy of Torchwood, wasn't he? So, why should he believe him?_

"_Hi Lisa. It's Ianto." He started, pausing slightly as he thought about where to take this, "Just to let you know I booked a table at that Italian you like for tonight. I'll see you later. Love you." He then quickly hung up, and dropped the phone back into his pocket, before doing the same thing with the ring box. He was being paranoid, turning into one of Torchwood's tin soldiers. Everything would be fine, and with that he reached into the 'Drop Shoot' beside his desk, to get the next artefact he was meant to be archiving. _

TW-TW-TW-TW-TW-TW-TW-TW-TW

Why hadn't he listened to him? Why? Why? Why? As he came back to himself again, that was all that was flowing through his head. Him and Lisa never got to go to dinner. She never saw the ring he had spent hours picking out.

"That sounds like the Doctor." The Captain mumbled from in front of him, once again grabbing Ianto's attention.

"He could have saved so many people." Ianto practically growled, "If he hadn't insisted on being so cryptic, if hadn't wanted to push Yvonne's buttons. It was his fault." That made the Captain angry, as he glared at the younger man, as Ianto's face crumpled thinking about what he and Lisa may of had together, if the Doctor had just told him exactly what was going to happen,

"It wasn't." Jack boomed back, his voice softening slightly as he saw Ianto's tears, "If he'd known the terrible things that were going to happen, if he could have stopped it, he would have. You know as well as I do, it was Yvonne's fault. The Dalek's and the Cybermen's fault, not his." Ianto didn't even respond, hearing the creatures named brought back the fear and the fury. The confusion of the day of the battle. The day that changed his life.

"Everything went wrong after that." He muttered, tears once again brimming as the familiar pain and guilt engulfed him, like a fire.

* * *

**So, I hope you enjoyed the chapter.**

**I did warn readers at the start of the last chapter that this is becoming more of a character study, so I'm sorry if it's not as action packed as you would have liked it to be. **

**I will attempt to get the next chapter up as soon as possible, and please Favourite, Alert and Review. As always I do love to hear what you think**

**Til' next time **

**TTFN (Tah Tah For Now) **


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